Encouraging emotional openness in adult children

Youngsters and young adults struggling to share their worries…. Should I speak up? Is it okay to weep? Will they judge me if I confess I failed? Will I be taunted for having lost my job? So, many thoughts hurling around one after the other. Isn’t it?

It was the usual evening jogging in the nearby park. The other days light music in the ears cuts off the overhearing part. But, a conversation I overheard was primarily focused on an elderly woman complaining, “My son is in his 30s. But, he tends to shut off all communication and withdraws himself into a shell whenever he is worried.” The other lady confronted, “I ask my young children about their day after they are back from work. We have a hearty chat during the late evening.” Both the ladies have children of the same age group and were discussing two contradictory situations. Still wondering how to foster an open communication with your adult or young adult offsprings?

1. Putting up open-ended questions without intending to forcefully confront can help you in initiating conversations.
2. They should not feel scared of being judged, criticized, or dismissed for sharing their problems/tensions.
3. Sometimes, they just need someone to listen patiently and actively rather than simply advise.
4. Elderly parents need to acknowledge and respect their young son/daughter’s own experiences, responsibilities, and point of view. An assurance that they are valued and understood would open the doors to the closed conversations.
5. How to help them realize that there is no harm, no shame in being open about their emotions, their vulnerabilities. You may share some of your own vulnerabilities to help them feel safe in sharing theirs.
6. It is important to gain an insight of the new-age challenges and pressures. Be available whenever they are willing to open up.
7. Celebration of their achievements , doing activities, as simple as cooking can construct the informal set to allow conversations happen naturally.
8. Simply asking about their day can help maintaining an environment of open communication.